Do you wonder WHY your life is not changing?
For a LONG time, a very long time, I wondered too. I’d wonder why was it that my life was not changing EVEN when I made attempts to change my habits. I’d wonder WHY I was ALWAYS coming back to square one and why I’d continue to experience the same stuff over and over? You know that moment where you ‘recognise’ a situation because it’s kinda the same as the last one except maybe with a different person or in a different place. For the longest time, I had no clue that the reason why I kept REPEATING the same scenarios was simply because I held the same beliefs.
Not thoughts but beliefs. Thoughts occur on the surface but beliefs are at a much deeper level in a part of our subconscious, they are so ingrained within us that we are no longer aware that they are there. Just as you no longer notice the panorama after years of taking the same road. We also travel the same roads unaware that we are driving the same way that we always do, unaware that we are thinking the same things we always have and unaware that we are doing it over and over in our head. We become unaware of our surroundings as we have become unaware of our thoughts.
We are also deeply unaware that our thoughts are completely fueled by our beliefs, which brings me to this point:
(if something in your life is not working, we dont have to change lives, (thought in some cases, it may be necessary), but we do have to change beliefs.
And this brings us to the next step.
1) Questioning your beliefs
How often are you in the habit of questioning your beliefs? Do you ever?
I mean really, do you ever ask yourself if a thought you are thinking is benefiting you?
Have you ever wondered if your thoughts ARE actually true?
When someting in your life is not working, do you get curious of how come it isn’t? And whether it can be changed? Or do you just keep going regardless whilst getting the same results with some variation maybe, but NEVER questioning your MO (modus operandus) aka beliefs.
The reason I ask is because I never used to question my thoughts, let alone my beliefs. In fact it never occurred to me to question what I believed and what I thought, if anything. I was much better at questioning other people’s thoughts and beliefs, whilst assuming my thoughts to be true which means that EVEN when they did not serve me, I would still believe them wihtout question… literally.
INSANE…. right? Considering the amount of pain we cause ourselves just by holding onto certain thoughts.
Sure our thoughts and beliefs are the result of years and years of conditioning and it starts early, through our environment, community and experiences.
Just becuase a thought was true yesterday, does not make it true today
In other words just because you believed something yesterday does not mean you have to believe it today.
Yet we do. We are trained to think a certain way and we do so, without question. We go where the thoughts take us rather than take the thoughts where we want to go.
This brings me to this very point, that we want to start being aware of our thoughts becasue they greatly impact the way we act, behave and consequently shaping our life on ALL levels.
2) Becoming aware of our thoughts
We believe our thoughts, because our thoughts reflect our beliefs.
We believe our thoughts because we forget to question them.
But even further than that, the very idea of questioning what we believe in, makes us uncomfortable because it treathens everything we know and everything we think we know, it threatens our sense of self, which to our ego means anihilation.
But does it really?
In truth challenging our thoughts and therefore our beliefs allows us to expand, grow and transform ourselves and as a result our lives. Change, growth and transformation is never comfortable, yet we can learn to appreciate the discomfort, because discomfort means new possibilities. From that view point it is much easier to ease into the dis-comfort.
Challenging the way we think means that we take responsibility for our reality.
It means that we dont just accept what we think and it means that we dont resign ourselves to a particular reality.
Remember that thoughts and beliefs shape our experiences and create our reality.
The idea is to challenge them knowing that when we do, new doors open up, remembering that a thought is only as true as we accept it to be.
Learning to challenge our thoughts is an important element to creating the life we love.
3) Challenging our thoughts
When a thought comes up for example saying to you…
This is wrong… Ask, according to who?
I am like this! Ask, are you really? what if you weren’t?
I dont like this! Ask, how come I don’t like this? Where does this come from? what does it mean for me?
I am shy! Ask, am I really? How come? Do I even like being shy? What would it be like to not be
I like shopping! Coffee! Alcohol! Ask, do I really like these things? Or does it come from my environement/culture/family/friends?
Be curious about your thoughts? How much do they reflect who you would really like to be? And if they don’t how come you are not questioning them?
Get to know YOU. Why? Because the more you know YOU, the more ease you invite into your life, and it becomse easier to discern between the things that add to your life and the things that dont.
Knowing who you are, helps create the life you want with intention rather than by default.
It allows others to know who you are and it is an invitation for others to respect you for exactly who you are.
Knowing who we are, helps us become authentic. It really is the basis. If you are not walking your talk, chances are, you are not questioning your beliefs enough.
You cannot be truly happy holding onto beliefs that do not serve you, that do not allow you to become a better version of who you were yesterday.
Challenge your thoughts, not from the need to be right, challenge them as a way to find out who YOU are, what YOU like, what YOU dont like and also what you want and do not want. Not so you can judge you or others, but only so you can become more in alignment with your own truth, so that you may start creating a life YOU love.
Challenge your thoughts! Do it fervently, knowing that thoughts are like clothes, would it ever occur to you to wear something you did not like? Would you wear something that makes you feel bad about yourself? Didn’t think so, why? Because it just wouldn’t feel good to do it, simple, and you wouldn’t think twice about it.
Thoughts are the same. Our lives would be a lot more ease, if when a thought came up that did not feel good, we would simply choose to not wear it. As you would wear something that you do not like, that does not flatter you. Why should you, since it does not benefit you?
It helps to remember that you dont have to believe your thoughts and that the more aware you become of your thoughts and of the beliefs that run these thoughts, the more likely you are to question them and in turn create a new reality, a reality that matches what you really do desire.
So the question now is, what exactly are you believing?